Life thoughts

Google searches

I just Googled “How to know to pursue an MD-PhD.” Then I stopped, stepped back, and laughed at myself. How in the world would a quick Google search give me any kind of reliable, meaningful, and honest information about such a big – and personal – question? It was so absurd that I actually laughed out loud to myself. While a funny example, I took a peek at the other auto-fill suggestions that Google supplied as I was typing: “How to know about my future” or “How to know if you’re in love” or “How to know to trust someone”. I thought about how deep, and complex, those questions are and, consequently, how deeply we yearn for quick and easy answers to them. I’m convinced that we all long for easy answers to hard questions. We desire for someone to tell us what to pursue in life, who to marry, when to make big investments, when to change careers, etc. Maybe you don’t wish for answers and enjoy the waiting game, but most of us would love to have an infinite collection of those answers at our fingertips. They make life simpler, less stressful, and more predictable. They make things easy.

But we don’t. We don’t have the answers to life’s big decisions – like whether or not to spend 7-8 years in school pursuing an MD-PhD or when to get married or when to change careers. We are sometimes lost, indefinitely, for answers at all. After I did my quick search and realized how silly it was, I thought about how blessed I am to be in a position of such difficult decisions. I am okay with not finding anything that resolved my questioning at the end of that Google search. I’m okay because I understand that we have hard decisions in life because that means we are living it, robustly and consciously. We are not sitting around waiting for life to happen but are instead posed against challenging and thought-provoking questions; if you’re asking when to get married that means you appreciate and are active in the process of finding lifelong love. If you’re worrying about a career change, it means you are thinking about the condition and happiness of your future. I am considering “next step” decisions in my education, and I’m blessed to have the opportunity to consider those options. After my quick-and-easy Google search, I, unsurprisingly, didn’t find anything that answered my question. I found some helpful sites with anecdotal advice or frequently asked questions, but ultimately these hard decisions are answered based on our own considerations, life experiences and goals, and provisions for what we consider to be important and meaningful. Instead of mindlessly searching for answers, on the internet or otherwise, it may be better just to have a conversation with someone – yourself, a friend, a mentor – about why you’re asking that question and what are the considerations that led you there. In life, it is okay to not have answers to these questions just yet. I really believe they are coming and only require patience, grit, and perseverance before they show up in full view. Sometimes, all it takes is a silly search on the internet to remind you that life is far more complex than Google can answer, and that is perfectly okay.

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a word to my ladies out there.

A word to my ladies out there.

You are worth it.

You are worth discovering. You are worth an education. You are worth diligently and passionately chasing your dreams. You are worth the time, the effort, and the reward. You are worth waiting for.

You are worth being loved. You are worthy of changing your family lineage. You can absolutely accomplish every single thing you wish to. You are fantastic. You are worth being loved. You are worth fighting for.

So, do not tell yourself you are worth anything less than these things. Don’t tell them to yourself, don’t let a boy tell them to you, don’t let a professor tell them to you, don’t let your parents tell them to you. I promise you are worth it.

You can do it. You can become a doctor, or a business woman, or an astronaut, or a lawyer. You can be an executive. You can own your own clothing line. You can escape your situation. You can empower those around you. You can teach. You can help others. You can shine.

You are worth more right now than a cute boy whose attention you want. You are worth more than the approval of others. You are worth more than a small town, dropped out of school to live at home life. You can get an education. You are worthy to abdicate what is holding you back from chasing your dreams.

NOTHING should be in your way. If you want to go to college, work hard for scholarships. If you’re passionate about making people feel beautiful, become a cosmetologist. If you want to better the world, start doing research. If you want to own a coffee shop ice cream parlor (because honestly who doesn’t), then start networking and start SURROUNDING yourself with individuals whom you aspire to be like!

Absolutely no guy is worth you dreams. No guy is worth your insecurity about your dreams. No man should hinder you from seeing your worth and actively seeking a life that you are in love with. As women let’s start focusing on ourselves. I don’t think this is selfish, because it is okay to discover who you are and what you love before someone else decides that they love who you are and what you love, too.

It disappoints me so badly to see a generation of women settle for less than what they deserve. And it needs to be talked about! As role models for little girls, let’s please start showing them that they are worth more than what society tells them they are. It has to start with us. We have to be able to teach, and to teach we have to be able to understand. We have to understand our worth, our abilities, and recognize what is holding us back.

Leave the small town. Even if it’s for a year. Even if it is for a semester. Go outside of your comfort zone. Talk to people you’ve never thought of talking to before. Look for opportunities to try new things. Learn.

Learn about yourself.

Learn about the world.

Learn about others.

Learn about what makes your heart beat fast. Learn about what you can’t stop thinking about. Just learn.

Ladies, please recognize your worth. Don’t settle for what you are told that you are worth.

I promise you are worth more.

Don’t be average. Be extraordinary. Be unique. Be different. Stand up for your morals. Don’t be afraid to leave home. Don’t be afraid to study something hard in some place new. It will make you better. Maybe, just maybe, if we learn that we are worth more than a dissatisfying life we will start making choices that will help us lead better lives. Go get an education. And then tell others the rewards of recognizing how beautifully worthy you truly are.

You are worth it.

Share the love, ladies. I believe in you.

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Well, This Is Different…

This is unlike anything I have ever posted; for that reason, I am choosing to post it! I think it is important to reveal my dynamic side as well as my not-so-dynamic side (yes, I do thoroughly enjoy painting my nails and being fashionable, but even more so I enjoy reading and writing about complex ideas such as this). This is an essay I recently wrote for my Intro to Sociology class for college. I found this topic to be intriguing, and I enjoyed researching and studying the concepts throughout the past two weeks. I have to view these ideas (and all the other ideas studied in this class) through a sociological perspective. Meaning I try to leave out personal bias, opinion, and thought. Of course, that isn’t always as easy as it seems! I must tell you that these concepts are based on factual evidence provided by professors, biologists, anthropologists, geneticists, and professionals in their field of study. I hope you take the time to read (it is quite lengthy, my apologies!) and maybe it will inspire you as it has me to find faith in humanity again.

Let me warn you: this is an educational blog post. It may not be as popular as my others but I still wanted to share it with you guys!

This is written as informal discussion post so all in-text citations have been excluded and proper format isn’t required.

“Race is a socially constructed category composed of people who share biologically transmitted traits that members of a society consider important . In America, for several years we have used physical differences to classify people into four or five groups we call races. Races are categories that are assumed to be unchanging. Meaning, once you are in a race it is often very difficult to escape the racial group and all of its stereotypes and prejudices that come along with it. Race assumes that genetics sets us apart; however, these things aren’t rooted in biology, but instead ascribed to biology according to biological anthropologist, Alan Goodman. Americans have had many assumptions about different races and what characteristics pertain to certain races. For example, blacks are better athletes, Asians are more intelligent, whites are wealthier, and Hispanics are hard workers. These assumptions are often generalizations we call stereotypes. Among these assumptions are also the beliefs that interracial marriage lessens the integrity of a society, racial inequality is essential to a functioning society, certain diseases cause racial groups to die earlier, and races have genetically determined traits for sexual appetites and reproductive capacities. According to pbs.org, race is a modern idea. In fact, ancient societies did not divide based on physical differences as we do today, but instead on religion, class, status, and language. We as a society have developed these groups that often lead to lost job, business, and marriage opportunities. So, how do we as a society “unmake” what we have “made”? Race, though it seems simple and fixed, is often complex and changing. First, we must define what our perceptions are about race. Then, determine the facts of race; and lastly, more forward towards a goal that benefits society, and every race in it, as a whole.
Race is assumed by most (including myself prior to my research on these topics) to be a genetically inherited trait. I think most people do not think any differently of this concept due in part to the fact that they don’t actually think about this concept. Race is a socially accepted idea in America. Because we accept this as Americans, we also accept all of the issues that come with it. It is important to realize that yes race is real, but not in the terms that most people think it is. What I mean is that no, race is not real in the theory that one inherits it genetically from the traits passed down from his or her mother and father. One does not inherit race the same way he or she inherits eye color, hair color, hair texture, skin color, body shape, musical, athletic, and intellectual ability, personality tendencies, and other genetically determined traits. However, one does get ascribed a race based on these inherited qualities. For example, an African American male does not inherit a gene that labels him “African American”. He does, however, inherit a gene (or multiple genes) that control his skin color. Furthermore, based off the premise held by the color of his skin, that we as Americans have institutionalized, he is classified as African American. Although this concept is clear cut and comprehensible, the complexity of disapproving race as a biological concept would be a major paradigm shift in society. For it to be accepted that race is indeed something we have “made up” would be as to the ancient philosophers accepting that the world is indeed not flat: a concept not easily accepted. I noted during the Race: The Power of Illusion video that race has no definite physical markers. Some determine race based on skin color and some determine it by hair texture. This was proven to me to be true in the PBS exercise. I was asked to categorize people into racial groups based solely on physical appearance. There was a particular female who had white skin with unruly, curly hair who I classified into the African American category; my answer was accurate, and unfortunately I had answered it based solely on the texture of her hair. Just as the physical markers for race are uncertain, so are the actual races. For example, a black person in America may not be classified as black in Brazil or South Africa. As Ms. Warner stated in her synopsis of race, these physical differences are no more significant than two people who classify themselves as white but have different eye color, hair color, nose shape, and body shape. These are insignificant differences that hold great significant importance in our society’s eyes.
When studying this topic, a common argument is that African Americans are genetically favored towards having superior athletic ability. In Race: The Power of Illusion, a comment was made by a white man that blacks have superior athletic ability because they were closer to the primitive. Contrarily, a comment was made by a black man that whites often use this argument as a disposition for their tendency to have inferior athletic skills. Of course, both of these are opinions have no evidential support. In biological terms, the alleles for skin color and hair texture are inherited independently of one another; meaning that a black person may have silky, straight hair and a white person may have coarse, curly hair (Race: The Power of Illusion). In contrast to these seemingly “simple” genetic situations, the genes for musical talent, athletic ability, and intellectual ability are very complex, but they are also inherited independently of skin color. This is to verify that a white person is capable of having just as much athletic ability as a black person and a black person is capable of having just as much intellectual ability as a white person.
Statistics show that blacks make up only 12% of the total population but 75% of professional football players. A black woman stated that African Americans across the globe are often better at sports because they run or perform physical activity on a daily basis for survival. For example, Kenyans often have to travel long distances to retrieve food and water; thus, Kenyans are typically better performers at long distance races. These aren’t inherited behaviors though. They are learned behaviors. There are no doubt physical differences do encourage athletic performance in blacks, but whites with the same physical differences are just as capable of performing on the same level. One man indicated that it all comes down to drive and how bad you want it.
In Race: The Power of Illusion, I was very shocked to hear about the findings of the experiment executed by the teenagers. In short, the teenagers were asked to identify who they thought they would be most closely identical to genetically. As assumed, the whites chose whites, the blacks chose blacks, and the Asians chose Asians. They performed an experiment where they tested the mitochondrial DNA from each individual. Mitochondrial DNA doesn’t code for physical differences, so traits such as skin color and hair texture were excluded. After the experiment was concluded and the findings were displayed, I was shocked. From the beginning, the students thought they would be most similar to the ones they shared national origin with. Astonishingly though, the most differences between any two individuals, regardless of race, was 12 base pairs. One male was a 100% genetic match to individuals from Iceland, the Balkan Peninsula, and Africa; three completely different races. This was revolutionary to me because it showed that there are very few differences between any two individuals within a society, despite skin color. It proved that race is in reality just a socially constructed concept. (All of these concepts were applied from Race: The Power of Illusion).
There is a lot of evidence in racial stereotypes that cannot be denied. Animals are often instinctively forced to make judgments based on physical differences to survive. Just like animals, it is often innate for humans to make judgments. “We automatically, immediately, and unconsciously judge people based on race and sex,” says psychologist John Dovidio. In the exercises performed by the children asked to choose who they perceived as nice, mean, weird, etc., they displayed great stereotypes. These are just children who already have perceptions about race. Somewhere they have been exposed to negative stereotypes associated with certain races. This isn’t a surprising statement though. It is essential that we stop ignoring these stereotypes. To lessen discrimination, we have to address and identify these perceptions. After we recognize these stereotypes are real and are affecting our nation, we must next disclose the facts about the biological myth of race. Many are uneducated about these topics and need to be informed. Following the clarification that race is a socially constructed concept that we inevitably “made up”, we have to present the realities of the flourishing racial discrimination and inequality in the United States. Finally, to promote equality and decrease racial prejudices, we must educate the upcoming generations. We have to shatter the false premises of racial purity, various “subspecies”, and ethnocentrism. We have to inform and engage our youth with the truth about racism, genetic myths of race, and the future for racial concepts in America. Promoting change for racial institutions contemporarily would be favored, but it is critical to educate our younger generations about the reality and consequences associated with race.”

Sources:
Race and Ethnic Stratification Outline – Candace Warner, Associate Professor of Sociology
Video: Race: The Power of Illusion
pbs.org: What is Race? Is Race Real?
Video: Race and Sex: What We Think (But Don’t Say)
Sociology in Modules – Richard T. Schaefer

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